“Even more foolish is one who clings to words and phrases and thus tries to achieve understanding. It is like trying to strike the moon with a stick, or scratching a shoe because there is an itchy spot on the foot. It has nothing to do with the Truth.” –Yamada Mumon Roshi
Many of us in the lifestyle live in two worlds: public and kink. Rarely the two shall meet. So how do you know the really cool and funny person you met at a lifestyle event is a really cool and funny person 24/7? You don’t.
Many moons ago I took a week off from work, rented a cabin in the middle of the woods and started to write my Dictionary. I took pen to paper and started to write my own definitions to words like companion and success. I spent seven years creating what was to be the start of a new life and eventually a workshop series. My goal was to create a nonprofit self-discovery institute on 20 acres in Cooks Forest. We would hold seminars and workshops for other like minded folk. Creating a Personal Dictionary and Life Diary were to be the keystones of the institute.
Well, the Dictionary made an impact in my life. It created a false security in those who were within my sacred circle. After the loss of a long-term relationship, a fledging poly situation and a business, I no longer have a Dictionary. I discovered people are not to be trusted with words, mine or theirs. Today I observe. I pay attention to behavior, to actions.
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