“Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment.” --Rita Mae Brown
I have a Crossdressing.com profile. I am on Twitter. I have a Facebook page; though, I think I need to delete it. I have a FetLife profile that is pretty barebones. To the Fet World I show my links to this blog and my Rockin’ Robin tweets, tweets. My reason for being such an information minimalist isn’t that I’m too lazy, too uppity, or too indifferent to complete the profile in a traditional manner. It is because I want you to get to know me through meeting me. I am active on FetLife in order to know about events, to RSVP for the events I can get to, and to use their e-mail to keep in touch with friends. That’s it. I’m not advertising today for anyone or anything. I’m going to munches, events, and workshops. I meet people while I’m out and about doing devious and dubious shit.
Gone are the days of putting myself out there on a site, baring my soul and using electronic connections to make my personal connections. The last two times I did this I got seriously singed. If you take a whiff in my direction you may still pick up the lingering odor of burnt soul. And I ain’t talking about fish sticks.
I cannot harp on this point enough. Get off the computer every so often. Go to a munch. Go to an event. Talk to real live-in-the-flesh people. Assess how they carry themselves. Do they look you in the eye when you are talking to them? Do they listen to your questions? What kinds of replies do you get? Do they ask you about yourself? Do they share equally about themselves?
There are several attributes and traits that are real turnoffs for me. Like I don’t mind being cut off in conversations as long as the other person is completing my sentences, thoughts or is adding to the conversation. However the act of cutting me off is annoying when someone does it to draw attention towards themselves. Of course the consistent use of ‘coulda’, shoulda’ and oughta’ makes me want to run for the hills. You can catch a little bit of this through emails or from a profile; however, most control freaks have learned to hide this aspect of themselves when writing.
So from my previous experiences exercising bad judgment I have learned something about myself. I like to meet people. I enjoy hearing their stories and sharing mine. I like to laugh, smile and be nerdy-silly. I enjoy people who have a positive outlook and are willing to laugh along side of me. And who don’t mind me quoting a movie line or doing awful impersonations . Because around me you never know… Is it safe? … Is it safe?
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