July 11, 2011

“A child's appetite for new toys appeal to the desire for ownership and appropriation: the appeal of toys comes to lie not in their use but in their status as possessions.” – Christopher Lasch

There are a lot of collectors out there.  They are charming and alluring.  They are seductive.  They are intuitive creatures who know how to find our hidden insecurities.  Before we know it we are another notch in their Cross.  We are another story they add to their novel and a series of photos to illustrate it.

There is a common theme with collectors.  It isn’t their fault.  When they explain to you why the last few relationships fell short of expectations, they tell lengthy stories about how they really were trying to make it work.  But that-girl or what’s-his-name had these insurmountable problems.

Here’s my over-the-top example.  There’s this guy who said his last three girlfriends were mentally imbalanced.  And a fourth girlfriend was nuts from daddy issues.  He has a psychotic ex-wife who he can’t live with.  But he can’t live without her because she is the mother of his five children.  And three or four of his coworkers were mentally ill because they spread such vicious lies about him.  (Yes, this is a real person.  No, I am not exaggerating his claims.)

Here’s my subtle example.  Anyone who is overly invested in changing you (or your actions) to fit their group, clique, or their idea of things should be.  I know, maybe a bit too subtle.  But accurate.